out of the hospital...

I made it out of the hospital, and am doing really well, all things considered. I am getting nutrition in my body for the first time since September through my new J-tube!! (yay!)

The feeding tube seems to be doing okay. The nausea is pretty bad, and doesn't really lend itself to eating a lot in addition to the constant feedings. Right now, I am on a 24 hour feeding schedule, trying to get my body used to digesting again. It's on day 7 of digesting, and I think it's starting to revolt. I have encouraged it to "hang in there" as it were.

This morning I dry heaved into a bowl...not a good sign. Nothing came out, and I was super thankful... I managed to "hang in there" for 6 hours longer until my body let loose and threw up a lot of stomach acid. We're taking a break, now, from the feeding, so that my body does not revolt again.
This was my first bout of vomiting since I have come out of sugery--which I am totally thankful for. I am confident that this was just a small hiccup in my progress, and I am on the road to full health again.

Please pray for patience... especially mine. I want to be well... and it's going to be a long road.
Please pray for encouragement for Marcus... that he can stay positive even when it's tough.
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, according to His will...

And so we keep trusting in God's precious love, and resting in His comfort,
brelin

not for the weak of heart.

i was talking to my sister sarah last night. she told me that i needed to put some kind of warning on that link to what's actually happening to me in surgery tomorrow. So, HERE IS YOUR WARNING. Read the article if you are a doctor, if you are tough, or if you really want to know what's going to happen. If not, you might want to skip it... it goes into some hefty detail.

Okay, that's enough about that. Consider yourself warned. :)

Yesterday was a superfun day for me. I played and barfed all day long. We got a couple of our closets cleaned out in the house--one of my favorite projects when I am a little freaked out about something... organizing. When I was done with the closets, we stretched out by the pool, reading a good book--and soaked up the sun. Ahhhh, fabulous. Then we got cleaned up, and went to a movie and out for dinner. We cuddled on the couch and then went to sleep. Oh yeah, and we prayed about a million times. The perfect day... except for all the puking. But hopefully that will all be over really soon. That is what we're praying for anyway. Love and hugs. Amen.

last few days

The last few days have been better!! I haven't been throwing up straight stomach acid anymore!! YAY!! Thank you, Lord. Seriously.
I'm not really consuming a lot of food or beverages. I'm not doing it on purpose. I'm just not really into it. I'm not really hungry. I'm not really thirsty. I just kind of feel blah.

The good news is that I was able to gain some weight while I was on the TPN recently. The bad news is that it wrecked havoc on my liver again, and I had mega-elevated liver enzymes again. The doctor switched the type of TPN that I was on to a nonfat, low-calorie version. I've already lost a couple of pounds since I switched, but that's okay. He thinks that ought to do the trick for the liver. If it doesn't do the trick, then we may have to delay the surgery. I hope (and pray) that it does the trick.

If anyone would like to do some more reading about the J-tube (the type of feeding tube) they're putting in, here's a good website that you can check out. It explains it all very nicely. http://www.dukehealth.org/HealthLibrary/CareGuides/Cancer/TreatmentInstructions/jejunostomy

I think that's all for now.
Love and hugs to all!
brelin

my surgery info

My surgery to have the feeding tube placed in my sm. intestine will be on Wednesday, July 23 at 7:30 am. (I have to be there at 5:45 am!) The surgeon will be Dr. Cornejo. She will also be cutting out adhesions/scar tissue that she sees. She will start out laproscopically, and will move to a larger incision if she needs to.

Please pray that my body will not reject the TPN until the surgery (that is the IV nutrition that gets absorbed in the blood), that my liver will stay healthy(I sort of had a problem with that in the hospital)... and that I will not have any problems with clotting(from my previous bad arm clotting experience).

Please pray for peace, for wisdom for the surgeon and the docs, and for quick and complete HEALING for me.

the surgeon's office

so, for a while now, I have been "against" getting surgery. I was especially opposed to getting a feeding tube placed in my abdomen. As I look back, I think it is mostly a pride issue... and I think it's a little gross too. Pride... in that, I didn't want to be "crippled" or "dependent" on something else to help me live. For some reason the picc line wasn't quite as bad, or quite as permanent in my mind. A feeding tube in the intestine was over some line in my mind. However, I know that many of you have been praying for CLARITY for me. Yesterday morning, I woke up and knew that I needed to have the surgery. I knew with a certainty that I cannot explain or describe--but I have such peace about the decision--so I know that it is in line with God's will.

so, we called the surgeon that we met with in the hospital, and had a surgical consult today. we signed lots of paperwork and discussed the surgery with her this afternoon. the surgery will take place sometime next week... wednesday at the earliest. I will put the date in when I know it. She will be starting out laproscopically (with small incisions), and doing her best to cut out the scar tissue that way, but if it's too overwhelmingly filled with scar tissue from all the abdominal surgeries from the past, she will make another larger incision (over top of the current one) and cut out the adhesions that way. Then she will place the feeding tube and sew me back up once I am all cleaned out. The hope is that surgery will completely heal me and I won't need to use the feeding tube. But I will have it there just in case the surgery doesn't solve the vomiting problem.

Please pray specifically that the surgery will stop the vomiting completely and there will be no complications from surgery. Please pray for the surgeon, Dr. Cornejo. Please pray for peace for my family, especially Marcus. Please pray that we can all continue to keep our eyes focused on Christ--as this has been a long journey.

thank you all so much for your love and support!
brelin

home again, but still puking

I was released from the hospital on Wednesday night, as the doctor was headed out of town for the weekend. He sent me home with TPN and a home care nurse. My home care nurse comes once a week to change my picc line dressing, like before. This time I am on total nutrition, meaning that I get all the vitamins that I need from a lovely bag of creamy looking goo that I attach to my arm. I learned how to inject two viles of other vitamins into the goo so that it is even more nutrient dense. The goo has to infuse over 18 hours, so I am on a schedule from 5 pm to 11 am each day. Delish. :)

I am still barfing like crazy. Stomach acid, water, popsicles, or anything else I might try. I wake up in the middle of the night to vomit. It is not all that much fun... I wouldn't really recommend it. I am exhausted, and my pain is a little worse than normal today, but I am getting some more good drugs today.

My mom and dad (steve-o) are in town, taking care of me when Marcus goes to work. Sarah is coming to visit today, she should arrive sometime in the afternoon. I think that's all to report. :) We're having lots of fun!!

Keep those prayers coming!! brelin

hospital day ten

I had an MRI of my head last night to see if there is anything going on in my brain stem (which is the part that deals with nausea, I think.) I will have those results from the doctor around 12 or 1 this afternoon.
The doctor also checked my common bile duct with another blood test. I should have those results today also.
The doc started me on another new medicine on Monday night. I was able to keep a little food down (a couple of bites of mashed potatoes, and a bite of chicken.) Since that worked on Monday night, he prescribed the same medicine for last night dinner. I had about 1/2 cup of canned peaches, and those stayed down also. I took the same drug this morning, waited a bit, and then tried to eat a few bites of breakfast. Unfortunately, that came right back up after I ate it. Shoot.
Oh, and I am back on the TPN, they started it last night.

I am still thinking positive, and hoping to get out of the hospital sometime soon. The surgeon said that she could do surgery right away if we wanted to, but she also encouraged us to wait and discuss it together for at least a couple of days. We are praying that God will continue to guide the doctors, and that if He wants to miraculously heal me, He can go ahead and do that also. :)

Hugs, brelin

sunshine in my window

I am still at the hospital, and doing my best to keep fluids down so that I can go home. Over the past couple of days, my liver enzymes have gone down a bit so that they are able to restart TPN this morning. They are thinking that an allergic reaction to one of the many new meds that they've tried over the past week is causing the elevation in the enzymes.

Two days ago I had low cortisol levels, so they were checking to make sure that I didn't have adrenal insuffiicency. They did a cortisol test yesterday that came back normal, so that was good news.

The docs are still wondering what to do with me. I have 3 options at this point. One is to go home on TPN, one is to have exploratory surgery (they would do it laproscopically) and try to cut out some adhesions and see what else may be going on in there. And the doctor suggested that while they were in there, they ought to put a feeding tube into my jejunum (the first part of the small intestine).

I really don't want to have a feeding tube at this point, I am still hoping to get better on my own. The surgery itself could change the body chemistry enough that I may quit vomiting. We have a surgical consult today sometime, so we will discuss it and pray about it together. Please pray that we have clarity in our decision-making.

My spirits remain good for the most part. I am trusting that God knows right where I am, and is holding me tightly in his hand. I've had lots of visitors and lots of fun conversations with folks. Thank you for all of the cards, flowers, prayers, and love that you have been sending my way.

God has been sending me these awesome verses to keep me focusing on Him in the midst of all of these frightening times... This is the one from yesterday. "Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need." -Hebrews 4:16.

Love, brelin

liver enzymes

I've been on TPN since Monday, right after I got my picc line. The doctor said that some people "don't tolerate it" for some unknown reason. I happen to be in that minority. :) I always have been special, I guess. tee hee!!

So, they have removed my nutrition bag, my magnesium and zantac, my triglycerides, and all the other goodies. I'm down to one bag of normal saline and a pain patch on my arm. The doctor told me that I can "go ahead and try to eat whatever I want." So, again, we're back to eating and barfing--this time hooked up to an IV in the hospital.

I am enjoying a good book, and I have had lots of company--so the hospital hasn't been bad. My mom and I have gotten to spend lots of quality time together, which has been nice. She has even re-started cross-stitching.... an activity reserved only for sitting bored in the hospital.

Marcus' cold is getting better. He has been really busy on his shifts at work lately, not sleeping much at nights while he is on shift--so he's been able to go home and sleep after work, since my mom is here.

That is all that I have to report for now.
Love,
brelin

adventures in the hospital...

"Mom! Look at my face, there's something different!!" -me, excitedly.
"Bree, I don't see anything different about your face. You have a nice face."-my mom
"Mom! How can you not notice ANYTHING different?!?"-me.

That was the beginning of our day where I was trying to get my mom to notice that I got my NG tube removed in the middle of the night last night. Clearly, she didn't notice.

Just a few short hours later, beautiful sounds abounded in my room. A glorious cacophony rang throughout, down the hall, and into the fabulous nursing stations all around. This cacophony came from the RIDICULOUS beeping noises coming from the 5 IV pumps that I am currently hooked up to. I hope God was glorified with this "beautiful chorus."

On a more serious note, yesterday was pretty rough... I began vomiting the fluids that were being pumped into my stomach through the NG tube. They also found some blood in my puke as well. Since they pulled the NG tube out, I have been doing a bit better.

Today has been full of visitors and more tests (a pelvic ultrasound & a stomach ultrasound). Thank you for all of your prayers, kind words, and love that you've been sending our way.

I should find out all of the outcomes tomorrow morning. Please pray for direction for the doctors and wisdom for the nurses as well.

Hugs and love to you all.
brelin

in da hospital

...rollin' wit' my homies. :)

DISCLAIMER: let me start off in advance with a side note that i am on a narcotic drip medication in the hospital for abdominal pain, and a whole host of other abdominal systems. so what you are about to read may not make sense to you. if you start to trip up... do your best to begin thinking like a 5 year old and try again.

i got my picc line placed in my upper left arm yesterday, and am doing okay with that. i also got an NG tube placed last nigh. up my nose, down the back of my throat, and into my stomach. Yumm! Through my picc line, i'm getting TPN (total replacement nutrtion) during the day, and fluids at night.

more later... hugs and love!!!!!!!!!!!
bree