I woke up this morning feeling hopeful. Not necessarily feeling better, health-wise. But, feeling hopeful. This morning, I'm again relinquishing ALL power of my body, my plans, my life--and fully submitting them all to God. It seems that He has perfect plans that He carries out in His perfect time anyway, and I ought to trust Him because things seem to run much more smoothly when I do. So, I'm officially letting God handle it all.
I will continue to seek the wisdom of doctors. I will continue to take my medicines as prescribed, eat as I am supposed to, exercise when I am able to... and love without abandon. I will share joy with others as often as I can, I will smile at strangers, I will spread kindness to others, helping my neighbors, loving my family, and most of all, I will do my best to be an example of God's love to others in all I do.
I'll try not to tailgate, I'll buy someone a cup of coffee, I'll take time for that friend who needs it. I'll encourage others to do the same.
God, I pray that you help me not to be discouraged, frustrated, or angry during this time of illness. Instead, help me an encouragement to others. Help me to be a shining light for you. Give me the energy and the strength to make it through this day, because it is YOUR day. I love you, Amen.
Monday, April 27, 2009
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
the hospital... again.
So, it's been a while.
Since I went to the doctor, things have been getting progressively worse. The vomiting has been increasing, with little relief. We did manage to have lots of fun in the sun with some friend in Arizona on a trip over spring break on a trip that had been planned for several months. There were just lots of puke baggies involved.
Once we returned home (Easter Sunday), I was completely exhausted, and the pain was pretty out of control. By Monday morning, my vomiting was really bad. I was up all night Monday night, and by Tuesday morning I there was blood in my vomit again.... and not even a sip of water was staying down. We called the doc to see if I could go in for some outpatient IV fluids. He said that he wanted to admit me.
I was admitted to the hospital on Tuesday morning, and they started some IV fluids, pain meds, nausea meds, and blood work. They found that my liver enzymes were elevated. I'm still not really sure what that means... I think it has something to do with one of the lobes of my liver being pressed on by a vein or something, but I'm not sure if they can do anything about it. On Friday, they did a follow-up HYDA (sp?) scan to check something else, and I will check back in with the doc tomorrow.
The good news is that I'm keeping down fluids on my own again. I was released from the hospital on Friday night and am doing okay. I'm on a lot of meds, but am feeling pretty well considering. I have even kept down some toast!! :) My blood pressure is running pretty low, which leaves me feeling a little dizzy. But mostly I'm feeling pretty good.
I'm hopeful that this was just a little flare-up, and I'll be back to feeling terrific in no time!! :)
Thanks for all your prayers... and I'll try to keep my blog better updated.
brelin
Since I went to the doctor, things have been getting progressively worse. The vomiting has been increasing, with little relief. We did manage to have lots of fun in the sun with some friend in Arizona on a trip over spring break on a trip that had been planned for several months. There were just lots of puke baggies involved.
Once we returned home (Easter Sunday), I was completely exhausted, and the pain was pretty out of control. By Monday morning, my vomiting was really bad. I was up all night Monday night, and by Tuesday morning I there was blood in my vomit again.... and not even a sip of water was staying down. We called the doc to see if I could go in for some outpatient IV fluids. He said that he wanted to admit me.
I was admitted to the hospital on Tuesday morning, and they started some IV fluids, pain meds, nausea meds, and blood work. They found that my liver enzymes were elevated. I'm still not really sure what that means... I think it has something to do with one of the lobes of my liver being pressed on by a vein or something, but I'm not sure if they can do anything about it. On Friday, they did a follow-up HYDA (sp?) scan to check something else, and I will check back in with the doc tomorrow.
The good news is that I'm keeping down fluids on my own again. I was released from the hospital on Friday night and am doing okay. I'm on a lot of meds, but am feeling pretty well considering. I have even kept down some toast!! :) My blood pressure is running pretty low, which leaves me feeling a little dizzy. But mostly I'm feeling pretty good.
I'm hopeful that this was just a little flare-up, and I'll be back to feeling terrific in no time!! :)
Thanks for all your prayers... and I'll try to keep my blog better updated.
brelin
Sunday, March 22, 2009
a new look
Oh, I just wanted to give credit for the new look on my blog. Here is the link to cute and free blog backgrounds!!
http://simplychicblogs.blogspot.com
http://simplychicblogs.blogspot.com
the report
I had a good appointment with the doc on Wednesday; seeing him is sort of like seeing an old friend. When I walked into the office, he said, "My day is complete." Apparantly he has several women with ridiculously odd intestinal problems (me being in that category.) He had seen the other 3 in the hospital earlier in the day, so seeing me at the office just topped it off. :)
The doc suggested that I try a couple of different medications. One is a narcotic, and I'm simply not interested in going there yet. I'm hoping that I can get a little better without going down that road. He has a new theory of sorts... something relating to my mast cells, thinking that my intestines are basically allergic to food. Not tomatoes, or dairy, but ALL food. So everytime there is a stimulant, (food), it causes pain and often vomiting. To me, this completely makes sense because when I don't eat, I often feel pretty good. I know that never eating again is not a good solution, so he thought that perhaps I can lessen the problem with an antihistamine. I'll have to keep you posted.
Beyond my guts, I'm doing fine. My shoulder is almost totally better, and the pinched nerve in my foot is doing well too.
I'm enjoying substitute teaching, and am doing most of my jobs in the middle school. :) I love it!! I think my "acceptable noise level" is a little higher than most teachers, but I think that's okay. I figure if the students are working, and not hurting themselves or others, then it's all good. :)
Hugs to you all,
brelin
The doc suggested that I try a couple of different medications. One is a narcotic, and I'm simply not interested in going there yet. I'm hoping that I can get a little better without going down that road. He has a new theory of sorts... something relating to my mast cells, thinking that my intestines are basically allergic to food. Not tomatoes, or dairy, but ALL food. So everytime there is a stimulant, (food), it causes pain and often vomiting. To me, this completely makes sense because when I don't eat, I often feel pretty good. I know that never eating again is not a good solution, so he thought that perhaps I can lessen the problem with an antihistamine. I'll have to keep you posted.
Beyond my guts, I'm doing fine. My shoulder is almost totally better, and the pinched nerve in my foot is doing well too.
I'm enjoying substitute teaching, and am doing most of my jobs in the middle school. :) I love it!! I think my "acceptable noise level" is a little higher than most teachers, but I think that's okay. I figure if the students are working, and not hurting themselves or others, then it's all good. :)
Hugs to you all,
brelin
Monday, March 16, 2009
cry me a river........
For some unknown reason, the JT song is rolling through my head. I believe it is in large part due to the pain that I am currently experiencing in my shoulder and foot. Let me explain...
These past few weeks, there have been BUCKETS of snow dumping each day on the mountain. While my stomach/intestines have been less than stellar lately, I have still mustered up enough energy to embrace the snow in all of it's glory. Marcus and I headed up to Crystal Mountain for some glorious snowboarding conditions a little over a week ago. About 2 pm, I came crashing down the run, managing to bend my arm back a funny way and then land on it. I might have shed a few tears on the hillside while Marcus examined my arm for obvious breaks before I stuck it in my pocket, and headed down to the base. I prayed that God would not let me get carded while I purchased an adult beverage to dull the pain in my arm. Prayer answered. I imbibed, then went home, and then finally on Monday morning (last week), I went into the doc for some xrays. I separated my shoulder, but not "too" bad. He said I can head back up to the hill anytime, as long as I don't fall on my arm. I'll let you know how that goes, we're heading up tomorrow.
Oh, so while I was getting the ol' arm checked out, I mentioned that I had this weird pain in my foot. It turns out that I have a "fluke" thing that "unlucky" people get... a pinched nerve in my foot. The foot specialist gave me a cortizone shot, and I am doing a bit better now. I go in next month for one more shot.
I've been painting a rather "rose-colored" picture of my own health lately, which hasn't been entirely accurate. My vomiting has gotten increasingly worse these past few months. I'm not horrible, and am nowhere near as sick as I was--but I'm not doing nearly as well as I once was. I have an appointment to see the GI doctor on Wednesday, and am praying that he'll be able to provide some sort of treatment that will help get me back on track without drugging me up too much.
Okay, I think that's all to report today. Please pray that the appointment goes well on Wednesday, and that I get return to full health sometime soon.
Hugs,
brelin
These past few weeks, there have been BUCKETS of snow dumping each day on the mountain. While my stomach/intestines have been less than stellar lately, I have still mustered up enough energy to embrace the snow in all of it's glory. Marcus and I headed up to Crystal Mountain for some glorious snowboarding conditions a little over a week ago. About 2 pm, I came crashing down the run, managing to bend my arm back a funny way and then land on it. I might have shed a few tears on the hillside while Marcus examined my arm for obvious breaks before I stuck it in my pocket, and headed down to the base. I prayed that God would not let me get carded while I purchased an adult beverage to dull the pain in my arm. Prayer answered. I imbibed, then went home, and then finally on Monday morning (last week), I went into the doc for some xrays. I separated my shoulder, but not "too" bad. He said I can head back up to the hill anytime, as long as I don't fall on my arm. I'll let you know how that goes, we're heading up tomorrow.
Oh, so while I was getting the ol' arm checked out, I mentioned that I had this weird pain in my foot. It turns out that I have a "fluke" thing that "unlucky" people get... a pinched nerve in my foot. The foot specialist gave me a cortizone shot, and I am doing a bit better now. I go in next month for one more shot.
I've been painting a rather "rose-colored" picture of my own health lately, which hasn't been entirely accurate. My vomiting has gotten increasingly worse these past few months. I'm not horrible, and am nowhere near as sick as I was--but I'm not doing nearly as well as I once was. I have an appointment to see the GI doctor on Wednesday, and am praying that he'll be able to provide some sort of treatment that will help get me back on track without drugging me up too much.
Okay, I think that's all to report today. Please pray that the appointment goes well on Wednesday, and that I get return to full health sometime soon.
Hugs,
brelin
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
the study of Job.
I would like to start out by saying that I LOVE LENT. I know that's a little weird, but I REALLY enjoy doing the Holden Evening Prayer worship service. This year, there is a study of the book of Job going on each Wednesday after worship. I thought I'd check it out tonight, and am so glad that I did. We studied the first 3 chapters, and there are so many things that stuck out.
1. God's power is limitless, while Satan's power is completely limited. In order for Satan to make Job's life miserable, he had to ask permission from God.
2. Job was blameless, and his faith is totally overwhelming. Tons of crap happened to him in the first chapter, and his response was to fall down on his face and worship God. (chap 1:20) I'm totally in awe of Job's response, and pray that mine can be that good. God presents us with choices in the midst of suffering: do we fall down in worship? or do we run away from God?
3. Job's friends said nothing, because "sometimes suffering is too great for words." chap 2:13. Sometimes we don't have to say anything to help others--because just being present with them is enough. Thank you to all of you who have been present with me over the years that I've struggled with my health.
When we're confronted with suffering, we're asked to choose. Do we choose to follow a loving God in the midst of it all, or do we run away from Him in our times of strife?
1. God's power is limitless, while Satan's power is completely limited. In order for Satan to make Job's life miserable, he had to ask permission from God.
2. Job was blameless, and his faith is totally overwhelming. Tons of crap happened to him in the first chapter, and his response was to fall down on his face and worship God. (chap 1:20) I'm totally in awe of Job's response, and pray that mine can be that good. God presents us with choices in the midst of suffering: do we fall down in worship? or do we run away from God?
3. Job's friends said nothing, because "sometimes suffering is too great for words." chap 2:13. Sometimes we don't have to say anything to help others--because just being present with them is enough. Thank you to all of you who have been present with me over the years that I've struggled with my health.
When we're confronted with suffering, we're asked to choose. Do we choose to follow a loving God in the midst of it all, or do we run away from Him in our times of strife?
Monday, March 2, 2009
keep on truckin'
Hi All,
I just started substitute teaching today. It was my first day, and I taught 6th-8th grade health. Ironically, we were talking about medications, and their effects on the body. I had a good laugh to myself. It was certainly an adventure, I was really nervous before I got there, but then it all started going smoothly by the end of the day. Tomorrow, I'll be in a 5th grade class all day at one of the elementary schools. I can't wait.
I had a terrific 30th birthday. We had a rollerskating birthday party which 40 or so people attendend. It was fabulous. On my actual birthday, Marcus took me out for dinner and then we went to the Broadway production of the Lion King. It was magnificent, and really beautiful. Everyone should go see it.
I'm still plugging along with Bible study on Wed morning, and mentoring another student on Wed. afternoons. All are going well, and I'm thrilled with how terrific my 9th grader seems to be doing this semester. If you happen to be reading, you're awesome! :)
Health-wise, I am doing okay. I would say that I vomit most days, but not everything, and not everyday. On the days that I do get sick, it is typically more than once a day... but again, it is not everyday, and certainly not 20 million times a day--so I continue to feel good about my progress. My baseline level is still much lower than before 2007, but I'm adjusting.
Tonight I'm looking forward to a ballet recital for Maya, and then tomorrow is a basketball game for Garrett. Both should be a lot of fun~ :)
Hugs and love to all,
brelin
I just started substitute teaching today. It was my first day, and I taught 6th-8th grade health. Ironically, we were talking about medications, and their effects on the body. I had a good laugh to myself. It was certainly an adventure, I was really nervous before I got there, but then it all started going smoothly by the end of the day. Tomorrow, I'll be in a 5th grade class all day at one of the elementary schools. I can't wait.
I had a terrific 30th birthday. We had a rollerskating birthday party which 40 or so people attendend. It was fabulous. On my actual birthday, Marcus took me out for dinner and then we went to the Broadway production of the Lion King. It was magnificent, and really beautiful. Everyone should go see it.
I'm still plugging along with Bible study on Wed morning, and mentoring another student on Wed. afternoons. All are going well, and I'm thrilled with how terrific my 9th grader seems to be doing this semester. If you happen to be reading, you're awesome! :)
Health-wise, I am doing okay. I would say that I vomit most days, but not everything, and not everyday. On the days that I do get sick, it is typically more than once a day... but again, it is not everyday, and certainly not 20 million times a day--so I continue to feel good about my progress. My baseline level is still much lower than before 2007, but I'm adjusting.
Tonight I'm looking forward to a ballet recital for Maya, and then tomorrow is a basketball game for Garrett. Both should be a lot of fun~ :)
Hugs and love to all,
brelin
Monday, February 9, 2009
my latest news.
Hi All,
Thank you to all of you dedicated blog readers out there. I apologize for it being several weeks since my last post. I feel like somehow since my life is more stable medically, it's somehow not as interesting for the general public. Regardless, here is an update.
I just finished my paperwork for getting certified as an Emergency Substitute teacher for Snoq. Valley School District. I'm looking forward to getting started as soon as the state issues me my certificate.
Marcus and I just got back from another vacation. This time we went to sunny southern California. It was 80, sunny and wonderful! We went to the happiest place on earth, Disneyland, as well as Magic Mountain. We also met up with some friends from Sammamish, and watched a friend play basketball for Cal Lutheran. We learned that it's hip to say "T.O." when you're talking about Thousand Oaks.... and T.O. is like a Sammamish that's not in Sammamish.
Healthwise, I have been doing okay. I still vomit several times a week, and these past 3 weeks have been worse than "normal"--or the new normal, anyway. I'm not discouraged, and haven't really noticed a reason why... I'm just reporting so you know. :)
My little sis stayed with us for about a month before she moved out for a new job in South Carolina. She's enjoying it so far, and reports that her internal dialogue is starting to be in a southern drawl. I told her that she's not really one of us anymore.
I'm approaching another birthday, and am sooooooooooooooooo thankful for my much improved health this year. I am so glad that God's healed me, and given me new life and improved energy!! Thank you, God. Woo hoo!!
Hugs,
brelin
Thank you to all of you dedicated blog readers out there. I apologize for it being several weeks since my last post. I feel like somehow since my life is more stable medically, it's somehow not as interesting for the general public. Regardless, here is an update.
I just finished my paperwork for getting certified as an Emergency Substitute teacher for Snoq. Valley School District. I'm looking forward to getting started as soon as the state issues me my certificate.
Marcus and I just got back from another vacation. This time we went to sunny southern California. It was 80, sunny and wonderful! We went to the happiest place on earth, Disneyland, as well as Magic Mountain. We also met up with some friends from Sammamish, and watched a friend play basketball for Cal Lutheran. We learned that it's hip to say "T.O." when you're talking about Thousand Oaks.... and T.O. is like a Sammamish that's not in Sammamish.
Healthwise, I have been doing okay. I still vomit several times a week, and these past 3 weeks have been worse than "normal"--or the new normal, anyway. I'm not discouraged, and haven't really noticed a reason why... I'm just reporting so you know. :)
My little sis stayed with us for about a month before she moved out for a new job in South Carolina. She's enjoying it so far, and reports that her internal dialogue is starting to be in a southern drawl. I told her that she's not really one of us anymore.
I'm approaching another birthday, and am sooooooooooooooooo thankful for my much improved health this year. I am so glad that God's healed me, and given me new life and improved energy!! Thank you, God. Woo hoo!!
Hugs,
brelin
Friday, January 16, 2009
still doing awesome
So, I was just talking to a friend on the phone, trying to update them on all the fun in my life... and at the end of the conversation, I figured I had probably update my blog, so that you ALL can be aware of the great things happening!! :)
I continue to be fabulous health-wise. I have been able to stay off all of my meds since sometime in Oct/Nov, and am still feeling wonderful! I have a couple of bouts of vomiting per week, but it's nothing major, and certainly nothing that I can't deal with!
Marcus and I have season passes to Crystal Mountain, and I'm enjoying snowboarding and learning to ski. We've been there 7 times already this season, and are having an absolute blast. Yesterday, while Sammamish was in an angry cloud of darkness and gloom, we were enjoying the summit at Crystal, which was perfectly clear, sunny, and had glorious views of Mt. Rainier. Oh, and did I mention it was warm too? THANK YOU, God. seriously. It rocked.
I continue to wait for God's clear vision about what to do with my life. I enjoyed following the chaplain at Children's Hospital at the beginning of Jan. She was wonderful and her job sounded very rewarding, but I am simply not feeling a huge push from God to head that direction. One reason is that I don't really want to go to school forever (about 4 years full time). I figure that if God REALLY wants me to do it, He'll shove me in that direction, and I will just know that it's the right time and the right place for me.
Until I have a clear vision, I am beginning the process to get my emergency substitute certificate so that I can sub in some of the local school districts. I'm excited about the flexibility that will provide my schedule, and I'm also looking forward to being back with students again.
I continue volunteering with my Young Life group of girls on Wednesdays, and I am enjoying my weekly meetings with a cute girl on Weds after school. It is fun to be walking alongside students in the midst of the joys and struggles they experience.
Hugs, love, and THANK you for your prayers.
brelin
I continue to be fabulous health-wise. I have been able to stay off all of my meds since sometime in Oct/Nov, and am still feeling wonderful! I have a couple of bouts of vomiting per week, but it's nothing major, and certainly nothing that I can't deal with!
Marcus and I have season passes to Crystal Mountain, and I'm enjoying snowboarding and learning to ski. We've been there 7 times already this season, and are having an absolute blast. Yesterday, while Sammamish was in an angry cloud of darkness and gloom, we were enjoying the summit at Crystal, which was perfectly clear, sunny, and had glorious views of Mt. Rainier. Oh, and did I mention it was warm too? THANK YOU, God. seriously. It rocked.
I continue to wait for God's clear vision about what to do with my life. I enjoyed following the chaplain at Children's Hospital at the beginning of Jan. She was wonderful and her job sounded very rewarding, but I am simply not feeling a huge push from God to head that direction. One reason is that I don't really want to go to school forever (about 4 years full time). I figure that if God REALLY wants me to do it, He'll shove me in that direction, and I will just know that it's the right time and the right place for me.
Until I have a clear vision, I am beginning the process to get my emergency substitute certificate so that I can sub in some of the local school districts. I'm excited about the flexibility that will provide my schedule, and I'm also looking forward to being back with students again.
I continue volunteering with my Young Life group of girls on Wednesdays, and I am enjoying my weekly meetings with a cute girl on Weds after school. It is fun to be walking alongside students in the midst of the joys and struggles they experience.
Hugs, love, and THANK you for your prayers.
brelin
Friday, December 26, 2008
fun adventures in mexico and the snow!
Marcus and I went to Puerto Vallarta at the beginning of this month! We had a wonderful time playing in the ocean, snorkeling at Las Caletas, and riding zip lines that were over a 1/4 of a mile long. It was 87 degrees, and sunny the whole time that we were there!! We soaked up the sun, drank lots of "miami vices" (a delightful mix of pina colada & strawberry daiquiri) and made some wonderful memories. :) Marcus' parents, Jim & Carol, came along with us, and we enjoyed spending lots of time together on the beautiful beaches.
Since then, we have been enjoying the winter wonderland that we call home. It seems like it has been snowing non-stop since we arrived home, and we are loving it!! I drove over to see my sister, Sarah, graduate from WSU on Dec. 13th! We are super proud of her for being a supergenius, and are looking forward to her coming to live with us while she starts a new job in the Seattle area. She'll be joining us sometime at the beginning of January for a couple of months until she finds a place to settle down.
Marcus and I have season passes to Crystal Mountain and have already gone snowboarding & skiing twice. I have decided to pick up skiing after a 15 year respite, and am pretty impressed with myself so far. I only fell 4 times the whole day! :) I have almost fully retired from my job at American Eagle, so that it doesn't get in the way of our snowboarding schedule!! :) I'm down to working just one or two Saturdays a month.
At the beginning of January, I'm hoping to get started doing some substitute teaching. I'll be throwing my name into the pool at Issaquah, Renton, and Snoqualmie Valley school districts. I figure I'll get back to working with kids, and enjoy the flexibility that subbing provides...I think it will be a good fit for right now.
I am still in the midst of discerning God's call on the possibility of chaplaincy and attending seminary. I will be doing a job shadow of a chaplain at Children's Hospital on January 6th--and am looking forward to the clarity that may come after that.
Our Christmas has been wonderful!! So far, we have celebrated with the Rismiller's and the Weakley's. We're looking forward to a spring thaw and then celebrating the Johnson family Christmas too. :)
Lots of love and hugs to you all! We are so thankful for all of you! Merry Christmas!!
brelin
Since then, we have been enjoying the winter wonderland that we call home. It seems like it has been snowing non-stop since we arrived home, and we are loving it!! I drove over to see my sister, Sarah, graduate from WSU on Dec. 13th! We are super proud of her for being a supergenius, and are looking forward to her coming to live with us while she starts a new job in the Seattle area. She'll be joining us sometime at the beginning of January for a couple of months until she finds a place to settle down.
Marcus and I have season passes to Crystal Mountain and have already gone snowboarding & skiing twice. I have decided to pick up skiing after a 15 year respite, and am pretty impressed with myself so far. I only fell 4 times the whole day! :) I have almost fully retired from my job at American Eagle, so that it doesn't get in the way of our snowboarding schedule!! :) I'm down to working just one or two Saturdays a month.
At the beginning of January, I'm hoping to get started doing some substitute teaching. I'll be throwing my name into the pool at Issaquah, Renton, and Snoqualmie Valley school districts. I figure I'll get back to working with kids, and enjoy the flexibility that subbing provides...I think it will be a good fit for right now.
I am still in the midst of discerning God's call on the possibility of chaplaincy and attending seminary. I will be doing a job shadow of a chaplain at Children's Hospital on January 6th--and am looking forward to the clarity that may come after that.
Our Christmas has been wonderful!! So far, we have celebrated with the Rismiller's and the Weakley's. We're looking forward to a spring thaw and then celebrating the Johnson family Christmas too. :)
Lots of love and hugs to you all! We are so thankful for all of you! Merry Christmas!!
brelin
Monday, December 1, 2008
more fun adventures!
Hi All,
It's been a while since my last post, but nothing really has changed. I am still feeling good most days, and enjoying all kinds of adventures again!!
I was able to celebrate Thanksgiving in the Tri-Cities with Marcus, my parents, siblings, and other super fun relatives. We had a great, but short, visit with them, and made it back to Seattle in time for me to leave for a wedding, and Marcus to get to work on Friday am.
The wedding that I was in was for a college friend, Ellen. A couple of us were her bridesmaids, and made the trek to Bremerton for a fun & busy wedding weekend. I made it home exhausted from the adventures on Sunday night. The wedding was beautiful, and it was fun to celebrate God's love in the context of marriage with them... Marcus joined me for the wedding, and we were rocking out on the dance floor. It was reallllllllly fun.
I'm home for Mon & Tues, and then on Wednesday we fly out to Puerto Vallarta for the week. We are VERY excited to lay on the beach, soak up the sunshine, and have fun with Marcus' parents who are joining us for their first time in Mexico. We are pumped to share this experience with them!! And I am so thankful that I'll be allowed to frolic on the beach and in the waves...SO thankful for healing.
I think that's all for me. Love, hugs, and happy belated thanksgiving!!
brelin
It's been a while since my last post, but nothing really has changed. I am still feeling good most days, and enjoying all kinds of adventures again!!
I was able to celebrate Thanksgiving in the Tri-Cities with Marcus, my parents, siblings, and other super fun relatives. We had a great, but short, visit with them, and made it back to Seattle in time for me to leave for a wedding, and Marcus to get to work on Friday am.
The wedding that I was in was for a college friend, Ellen. A couple of us were her bridesmaids, and made the trek to Bremerton for a fun & busy wedding weekend. I made it home exhausted from the adventures on Sunday night. The wedding was beautiful, and it was fun to celebrate God's love in the context of marriage with them... Marcus joined me for the wedding, and we were rocking out on the dance floor. It was reallllllllly fun.
I'm home for Mon & Tues, and then on Wednesday we fly out to Puerto Vallarta for the week. We are VERY excited to lay on the beach, soak up the sunshine, and have fun with Marcus' parents who are joining us for their first time in Mexico. We are pumped to share this experience with them!! And I am so thankful that I'll be allowed to frolic on the beach and in the waves...SO thankful for healing.
I think that's all for me. Love, hugs, and happy belated thanksgiving!!
brelin
Sunday, November 16, 2008
sweet! and not so sweet...
Hi All,
So, I've got good news and bad news. Which would you like first? I always like to get the bad news out of the way first, and then be pleasantly suprised at the end... so here it goes.
The bad news.
I am not going to be able to go back to work at Sammamish Hills Church after all. It seems that there is no money to add a new staff position, and some nasty black mold that had to get removed from the building has drained the budget more than they'd hoped it would... Thus, no "bring brelin back" campaign, because they have to get their budget fixed first. While I am extremely bummed about this, I continue to trust that God has a plan. It seems that I currently have no idea what that plan is, but am eager and happily waiting to find out what it might be.
The good news.
I am feeling called to Chaplaincy at a Children's Hospital, and am learning more and more what that entails. At this moment, I believe it means that I, Brelin Rismiller, will be headed to seminary sometime soon. I am continuing to grapple with what that really means, as I would be Pastor Brelin at the end of it all. It freaks me out a little bit, but I am both eager and excited to discern more about what God's call really is. So, the reason that I'm writing is so that you all can be praying for me to know what God's will is in all this. Please pray specifically that I follow His call above all else, and that He'll make it painstakingly obvious if this is not the direction that I am called to go.
The other good news.
I am healthy! I was able to run 5 miles today in the beautiful fall sunshine. I am enjoying this fall with new insight and appreciation for the beauty that is all around me. I am so thankful for each breath that I take, for each beat of my heart, and that I'm no longer attached to life-sustaining tubes of any kind. I have no picc lines, no blood clots, no feeding tubes, no shots, and just one medicine (and a lot of vitamins!) I got my tube out exactly 14 months from the first day I started vomiting... and I am thrilled for the drastic progress that has taken place since surgery on July 23rd--I am also completely thankful for all of your prayers.
The best good news.
I am currently in LOVE with this passage from Psalm 37.
"Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him and He will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, and the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the Lord, and wait patiently for Him."
Waiting patiently, (as best I can.)
brelin
So, I've got good news and bad news. Which would you like first? I always like to get the bad news out of the way first, and then be pleasantly suprised at the end... so here it goes.
The bad news.
I am not going to be able to go back to work at Sammamish Hills Church after all. It seems that there is no money to add a new staff position, and some nasty black mold that had to get removed from the building has drained the budget more than they'd hoped it would... Thus, no "bring brelin back" campaign, because they have to get their budget fixed first. While I am extremely bummed about this, I continue to trust that God has a plan. It seems that I currently have no idea what that plan is, but am eager and happily waiting to find out what it might be.
The good news.
I am feeling called to Chaplaincy at a Children's Hospital, and am learning more and more what that entails. At this moment, I believe it means that I, Brelin Rismiller, will be headed to seminary sometime soon. I am continuing to grapple with what that really means, as I would be Pastor Brelin at the end of it all. It freaks me out a little bit, but I am both eager and excited to discern more about what God's call really is. So, the reason that I'm writing is so that you all can be praying for me to know what God's will is in all this. Please pray specifically that I follow His call above all else, and that He'll make it painstakingly obvious if this is not the direction that I am called to go.
The other good news.
I am healthy! I was able to run 5 miles today in the beautiful fall sunshine. I am enjoying this fall with new insight and appreciation for the beauty that is all around me. I am so thankful for each breath that I take, for each beat of my heart, and that I'm no longer attached to life-sustaining tubes of any kind. I have no picc lines, no blood clots, no feeding tubes, no shots, and just one medicine (and a lot of vitamins!) I got my tube out exactly 14 months from the first day I started vomiting... and I am thrilled for the drastic progress that has taken place since surgery on July 23rd--I am also completely thankful for all of your prayers.
The best good news.
I am currently in LOVE with this passage from Psalm 37.
"Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him and He will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, and the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the Lord, and wait patiently for Him."
Waiting patiently, (as best I can.)
brelin
Friday, November 7, 2008
pure joy.
I cannot begin to express the feelings of JOY/excitement/relief/freedom/THANKFULNESS that are bursting from me this day. I just got home from my doctor's appointment, during which my feeding tube was removed!!! It feels sort of like getting your braces off--only WAY better. Like something is missing from your body... but you're not really sad to see it go. :) The doctor was thrilled with the progress that I've made... impressed with my determination to get well, and off the meds that I wanted to.
Here are some of the things that I'm thanking God for this day:
1. I am completely off of medications, except one... which the doctor says I can safely stay on forever.
2. I have my feeding tube out.
3. I can swim and lay on the beach in Mexico at the beginning of December.
4. I can return to a full workout! (i've been having to modify since surgery, but he says I'm good to go now. :))
5. I have an amazing loving family, church family, and awesome community that has been so supportive of Marcus and I all along. We are so blessed to have so much prayer support, encouraging hugs, and well wishes from you all.
Thanks to all who have stuck with us on this wild adventure. :) Yay!!
In Christ's awesome love,
brelin
Here are some of the things that I'm thanking God for this day:
1. I am completely off of medications, except one... which the doctor says I can safely stay on forever.
2. I have my feeding tube out.
3. I can swim and lay on the beach in Mexico at the beginning of December.
4. I can return to a full workout! (i've been having to modify since surgery, but he says I'm good to go now. :))
5. I have an amazing loving family, church family, and awesome community that has been so supportive of Marcus and I all along. We are so blessed to have so much prayer support, encouraging hugs, and well wishes from you all.
Thanks to all who have stuck with us on this wild adventure. :) Yay!!
In Christ's awesome love,
brelin
Friday, October 31, 2008
still going strong...
Hi Everyone,
I just wanted to share that everything is continuing to go well health-wise. I have been able to stay off the pain meds, and I am now on day 3 of no topamax. The transition has been a bit rocky... with a little nausea and one bout of vomiting, but I'm going to try and hang in there, hoping that my body will adjust all the way to life without chemicals.
I'm still working at American Eagle in Redmond. It's a nice change of scenery for me each day I head to work, and the people that I work with there are great. I'm enjoying my part-time adventures, and the employee discount is nice too. :)
I'm continuing a study of Genesis with a group of women in Mercer Island, through CBS. The study is wonderful, and God's love is revealed more fully in each text. I just finished reading about Abram and his crazy adventures. It seems that the message running throughout is God telling His people over and over again to, "trust me, and I'll get you through." It's so great to know that He never abandons us, especially in our times of sorrow and doubt. awesome.
Marcus is still fine, and still loves his job firefighting. He'll be taking his "year 3" exam in April, and then he's a full-fledged firefighter. Very fun. He is such a rock of support to me, and I'm so thankful that God blessed me with his love.
Well, I guess that's all for me. Have a blessed week, and happy Halloween!
brelin
I just wanted to share that everything is continuing to go well health-wise. I have been able to stay off the pain meds, and I am now on day 3 of no topamax. The transition has been a bit rocky... with a little nausea and one bout of vomiting, but I'm going to try and hang in there, hoping that my body will adjust all the way to life without chemicals.
I'm still working at American Eagle in Redmond. It's a nice change of scenery for me each day I head to work, and the people that I work with there are great. I'm enjoying my part-time adventures, and the employee discount is nice too. :)
I'm continuing a study of Genesis with a group of women in Mercer Island, through CBS. The study is wonderful, and God's love is revealed more fully in each text. I just finished reading about Abram and his crazy adventures. It seems that the message running throughout is God telling His people over and over again to, "trust me, and I'll get you through." It's so great to know that He never abandons us, especially in our times of sorrow and doubt. awesome.
Marcus is still fine, and still loves his job firefighting. He'll be taking his "year 3" exam in April, and then he's a full-fledged firefighter. Very fun. He is such a rock of support to me, and I'm so thankful that God blessed me with his love.
Well, I guess that's all for me. Have a blessed week, and happy Halloween!
brelin
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
more fun news
Hi all!
For the first time in as many months as I can remember, I am completely off of pain medication. I have been working on getting off of them since I saw the doctor in September, and I ripped off the last pain patch last week, finally able to manage the pain on my own terms. Don't get me wrong, it still hurts each day--but not so much that I can't take it. And I think it will be even better once they take the feeding tube out too. :) YAY!!
Next piece of good news, I am also weening off of topamax as well. I am down to just 100 mg, from 150 mg, and still feeling good. This is a nerve-dulling medication, and I'm not especially fond of the "stupid" effect on my brain... so I'm trying to get off it. So far, so good. My weight is staying stable, and I am feeling good most days.
Final, and most fun piece of news is... Church council at Sammamish Hills voted last week that I can return part-time to work with Kaitlin, our new youth ministry director, once funds are raised. I am sooooooooooo excited about the possibility of mentoring her, working with the students & parents at SHLC again, and getting to use my gifts again. The church budget is in the red, however, so people are going to have to step up their giving before I can come back. Perhaps they can do a "bring Brelin back" drive. :)
Anyway, hugs and love to all you faithful readers... is anyone even reading still? :) If so, catch my mom up, she says she doesn't read anymore. :)
brelin
For the first time in as many months as I can remember, I am completely off of pain medication. I have been working on getting off of them since I saw the doctor in September, and I ripped off the last pain patch last week, finally able to manage the pain on my own terms. Don't get me wrong, it still hurts each day--but not so much that I can't take it. And I think it will be even better once they take the feeding tube out too. :) YAY!!
Next piece of good news, I am also weening off of topamax as well. I am down to just 100 mg, from 150 mg, and still feeling good. This is a nerve-dulling medication, and I'm not especially fond of the "stupid" effect on my brain... so I'm trying to get off it. So far, so good. My weight is staying stable, and I am feeling good most days.
Final, and most fun piece of news is... Church council at Sammamish Hills voted last week that I can return part-time to work with Kaitlin, our new youth ministry director, once funds are raised. I am sooooooooooo excited about the possibility of mentoring her, working with the students & parents at SHLC again, and getting to use my gifts again. The church budget is in the red, however, so people are going to have to step up their giving before I can come back. Perhaps they can do a "bring Brelin back" drive. :)
Anyway, hugs and love to all you faithful readers... is anyone even reading still? :) If so, catch my mom up, she says she doesn't read anymore. :)
brelin
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
show and tell
FIRST OF ALL, I wanted to share that I have been working out since I got my feeding tube put in, and I was able to run 5K in the Salmon Days race on Sunday! I ran the whole way, and I'm super proud of myself for finishing!! :)
Secondly, I was invited to share my faith story with a fabulous group of 9th graders tonight at Sammamish Hills, the kids who will be confirmed this fall. It was such a treat to get to see all the kids again... and I loved getting to share my faith story too!
Here's what I came up with. This is the one that I decided not to go with.
You can pray for something a million times-and it may not seem like God is listening...or that He is not answering in the way that seems "right".
This last year has been like that for me. Sometimes it seemed like everything in the whole world was wrong. I didn't feel like myself anymore. I didn't have the energy to smile and laugh, or run or jump or play... My body was shrinking slowly, until I didn't recognize it as my own. My clothes were too baggy, my hair was falling out in clumps from malnutrition, and I'd already been in and out of the hospital multiple times. This had all been going on for months already, and I didn't know when it was going to be over. I kept crying out to God--wondering when He'd heal me, questioning myself--thinking that perhaps I'd lost my mind. I'd run into folks I knew, and it was such a relief to know that so many people were praying-but so difficult for me to not know what to say them when they asked, "how are you doing?". It was so discouraging to have to repeat, time after time, month after month-----for almost a year-----that nothing was different, that nothing had changed. That I was still vomiting 20 times a day. That I struggled daily with dehydration. That the doctors still couldn't find a treatment that worked. That in the later months, my heart was starting to show signs of damage, and my liver was having problems. And that despite all of the prayers, God still hadn't done anything.
Yet, God was doing something mighty in me. I sort of feel like a half-finished work of art. I imagine that is sort of what those 9th graders feel like too... That God is transforming us into this totally beautiful, super talented, amazingly brilliant, totally strong person--but I'm not quite there yet. I'm starting to feel fabulous, but sort of waiting on the edges for God to finish the project. He's starting to reveal His plan slowly to me, but He's cautiously giving me details, and asking me to wait on Him for the rest of the plan.
I trust that He will continue to work in me, and that all things will be done and completed in His perfect time. I pray that I will be able to be an example to others, that I a masterpiece crafted by the Creator's hand, displayed for all to see.
Amen.
Secondly, I was invited to share my faith story with a fabulous group of 9th graders tonight at Sammamish Hills, the kids who will be confirmed this fall. It was such a treat to get to see all the kids again... and I loved getting to share my faith story too!
Here's what I came up with. This is the one that I decided not to go with.
You can pray for something a million times-and it may not seem like God is listening...or that He is not answering in the way that seems "right".
This last year has been like that for me. Sometimes it seemed like everything in the whole world was wrong. I didn't feel like myself anymore. I didn't have the energy to smile and laugh, or run or jump or play... My body was shrinking slowly, until I didn't recognize it as my own. My clothes were too baggy, my hair was falling out in clumps from malnutrition, and I'd already been in and out of the hospital multiple times. This had all been going on for months already, and I didn't know when it was going to be over. I kept crying out to God--wondering when He'd heal me, questioning myself--thinking that perhaps I'd lost my mind. I'd run into folks I knew, and it was such a relief to know that so many people were praying-but so difficult for me to not know what to say them when they asked, "how are you doing?". It was so discouraging to have to repeat, time after time, month after month-----for almost a year-----that nothing was different, that nothing had changed. That I was still vomiting 20 times a day. That I struggled daily with dehydration. That the doctors still couldn't find a treatment that worked. That in the later months, my heart was starting to show signs of damage, and my liver was having problems. And that despite all of the prayers, God still hadn't done anything.
Yet, God was doing something mighty in me. I sort of feel like a half-finished work of art. I imagine that is sort of what those 9th graders feel like too... That God is transforming us into this totally beautiful, super talented, amazingly brilliant, totally strong person--but I'm not quite there yet. I'm starting to feel fabulous, but sort of waiting on the edges for God to finish the project. He's starting to reveal His plan slowly to me, but He's cautiously giving me details, and asking me to wait on Him for the rest of the plan.
I trust that He will continue to work in me, and that all things will be done and completed in His perfect time. I pray that I will be able to be an example to others, that I a masterpiece crafted by the Creator's hand, displayed for all to see.
Amen.
Friday, October 3, 2008
no news is good news :)
here's my life story...
i started working at american eagle at redmond town center part-time about 2 weeks ago, and i am totally loving it!! i am enjoying the fun aspects of working with the public in retail again, and i have enjoyed the employee discount as all of my fall and winter clothes from last year were too big... :)
marcus and i have been having lots of fun together and have been goofing off as much as usual. we purchased season passes for crystal mountain and are looking forward to an awesome snowboarding season. don't worry, the doctor approved. :)
i'm also doing a community bible study with my friend, abby on wednesday mornings. we meet in the middle on mercer island, and we are studying genesis. it's terrific so far, and we've got about 10 other terrific women of all ages in our group. yay!
i'm also leading a group of fabulous 9th grade girls from inglewood jr high on wednesday afternoons. we're studying the one minute bible, and we've got prayer partners too. i'm working with my friends, alaina and breanne on this, and am super excited for the year. :) our first meeting was super fun, and i can't wait for the rest of the year.
i think that's all to report. i'm sorry that it's been so long... our computer is broken at home, we're perhaps getting a new one sometime soon. i'll have to keep you posted.
much love and hugs to you all.
brelin
i started working at american eagle at redmond town center part-time about 2 weeks ago, and i am totally loving it!! i am enjoying the fun aspects of working with the public in retail again, and i have enjoyed the employee discount as all of my fall and winter clothes from last year were too big... :)
marcus and i have been having lots of fun together and have been goofing off as much as usual. we purchased season passes for crystal mountain and are looking forward to an awesome snowboarding season. don't worry, the doctor approved. :)
i'm also doing a community bible study with my friend, abby on wednesday mornings. we meet in the middle on mercer island, and we are studying genesis. it's terrific so far, and we've got about 10 other terrific women of all ages in our group. yay!
i'm also leading a group of fabulous 9th grade girls from inglewood jr high on wednesday afternoons. we're studying the one minute bible, and we've got prayer partners too. i'm working with my friends, alaina and breanne on this, and am super excited for the year. :) our first meeting was super fun, and i can't wait for the rest of the year.
i think that's all to report. i'm sorry that it's been so long... our computer is broken at home, we're perhaps getting a new one sometime soon. i'll have to keep you posted.
much love and hugs to you all.
brelin
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
good news from the doc!
I just got home from the doctor, and I have excellent news!!
He said that I am doing great, and that I can continue to wean off many of my meds. The goal is to be off all but two of them by the end of December!! :) My incision from surgery is healing fabulously, and it looks just like it is supposed to at this stage. He was very pleased that I hadn't used my feeding tube in over a month. I was very pleased to report that as well. :)
And now for the best news..............
He said that he will consider taking out my feeding tube at the next appointment!! The next appointment is November 1, which is really no time at all, when I think about how quickly the time since surgery has flown by! :) YAY!!
I'm so thankful for all of the excitement and joy and fun and love that the Lord has lavished upon me this past year. It's so nice to be out of the season of "darkness"--finally able to look ahead to the future with hope, and a fresh sense of joy and energy for each new day. Many blessings to all of you... and thank you all so much for your prayers. Honestly, I mean that from the bottom of my heart.
Brelin
He said that I am doing great, and that I can continue to wean off many of my meds. The goal is to be off all but two of them by the end of December!! :) My incision from surgery is healing fabulously, and it looks just like it is supposed to at this stage. He was very pleased that I hadn't used my feeding tube in over a month. I was very pleased to report that as well. :)
And now for the best news..............
He said that he will consider taking out my feeding tube at the next appointment!! The next appointment is November 1, which is really no time at all, when I think about how quickly the time since surgery has flown by! :) YAY!!
I'm so thankful for all of the excitement and joy and fun and love that the Lord has lavished upon me this past year. It's so nice to be out of the season of "darkness"--finally able to look ahead to the future with hope, and a fresh sense of joy and energy for each new day. Many blessings to all of you... and thank you all so much for your prayers. Honestly, I mean that from the bottom of my heart.
Brelin
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
hiking adventures
I am still unemployed. I enjoy this much more now that I am not vomiting 20 times per day. Marcus seems to work very little at his job as well... so we go on lots of adventures together. This last trip took us to the North Cascades, which I had never been to. We camped one night on some really pretty lake that I can't remember the name of, and then the next day we packed up our things and did a backpacking trip.
The doctor approved all of this, for those of you who are worried that I can't carry a backpack yet. :) We even brought our scale to make sure my backpack wasn't too heavy. We hiked the Thornton Lakes Trail which was a little too much of an adventure--we had to balance and walk on a log bridge (not easy on meds that make you dizzy when you have already low blood pressure), and then at the end, there was a short rock climb to get into the camp ground. I lowered my pack down to Marcus and it all worked out... but it was definitely an adventure. We did take some fabulous photos, and we had a lot of fun!! And the weather was totally gorgeous!! yay!!
Beyond all that, not much is going on. I am still feeling great!! I am keeping food down almost always!! When I do vomit, it is just once in a while... not a million times a day--totally do-able. I am able to get enough calories to keep my weight stable, even on all my adventures. :)
And we sold our car! Yay!
Hugs and love,
brelin
The doctor approved all of this, for those of you who are worried that I can't carry a backpack yet. :) We even brought our scale to make sure my backpack wasn't too heavy. We hiked the Thornton Lakes Trail which was a little too much of an adventure--we had to balance and walk on a log bridge (not easy on meds that make you dizzy when you have already low blood pressure), and then at the end, there was a short rock climb to get into the camp ground. I lowered my pack down to Marcus and it all worked out... but it was definitely an adventure. We did take some fabulous photos, and we had a lot of fun!! And the weather was totally gorgeous!! yay!!
Beyond all that, not much is going on. I am still feeling great!! I am keeping food down almost always!! When I do vomit, it is just once in a while... not a million times a day--totally do-able. I am able to get enough calories to keep my weight stable, even on all my adventures. :)
And we sold our car! Yay!
Hugs and love,
brelin
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
tuesday morning
So, I threw up my dinner on Sunday night also. I'm not really enjoying this trend. But last night, I got really nauseated--and then didn't throw up, so I take that as being a good sign.
Still no job news to report. But I will be sure to keep you all posted. I am expecting to hear something in the next couple of days.... so keep reading, you faithful bloggers. :)
We had the entire Rismiller family over for a festive gathering the other day... we were supposed to go swimming but it was a winter wonderland instead, so we mostly stayed inside. We were a little squished in our humble abode, but overall, it was really fun to see everyone. We decided that it was a "celebrate Brelin eating party". Yay!! Our friends, Abby, Aaron, & Kenzi came over too--and they always add super fun adventures to every shindig. :)
Marcus and I have slowed down on our crazy adventures the last couple of days. I attribute this to the freezing cold temperatures, pouring rain, and ridiculous cloud cover that seem to have taken over outside. I really love Marcus, and I'm glad that he really loves his job, but I really miss living where there is no sunshine. I'm sure many of my other fellow eastern WA friends will appreciate the lack of sunshine piece. I think I'm going to invest in a "happy light." This is some light that you can buy from the store that gives you the proper amount of natural light, so that you don't shrivel up and get prune fingers like when you sit in the bath tub too long when you're little. (just kidding, I made that part up.) Seriously though, I was reading in a medical journal at the doctor's office that people from the Seattle area actually suffer from a vitamin D deficiency from not getting enough sunlight. I'm sure my happy light will get plenty of use over the next 30 years until Marcus retires and we can move somewhere sunny. Tee hee!! :)
Okay, that's all for me.
Hugs and love.
brelin
Still no job news to report. But I will be sure to keep you all posted. I am expecting to hear something in the next couple of days.... so keep reading, you faithful bloggers. :)
We had the entire Rismiller family over for a festive gathering the other day... we were supposed to go swimming but it was a winter wonderland instead, so we mostly stayed inside. We were a little squished in our humble abode, but overall, it was really fun to see everyone. We decided that it was a "celebrate Brelin eating party". Yay!! Our friends, Abby, Aaron, & Kenzi came over too--and they always add super fun adventures to every shindig. :)
Marcus and I have slowed down on our crazy adventures the last couple of days. I attribute this to the freezing cold temperatures, pouring rain, and ridiculous cloud cover that seem to have taken over outside. I really love Marcus, and I'm glad that he really loves his job, but I really miss living where there is no sunshine. I'm sure many of my other fellow eastern WA friends will appreciate the lack of sunshine piece. I think I'm going to invest in a "happy light." This is some light that you can buy from the store that gives you the proper amount of natural light, so that you don't shrivel up and get prune fingers like when you sit in the bath tub too long when you're little. (just kidding, I made that part up.) Seriously though, I was reading in a medical journal at the doctor's office that people from the Seattle area actually suffer from a vitamin D deficiency from not getting enough sunlight. I'm sure my happy light will get plenty of use over the next 30 years until Marcus retires and we can move somewhere sunny. Tee hee!! :)
Okay, that's all for me.
Hugs and love.
brelin
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